My Oyibo Boyfriend

I met him on a Tuesday and within some hours...butterflies kept dancing in my tummy! 

He's cute, nice and very funny. A bit witty, I'd add.

He looks at me with a kind of sparkle in his eyes. But it was just two weeks to behold this lovely view.

He once asked how Nigeria was, then I didn't know how to start.

Would I start with the fact that Nigerians never keep to time or the fact that their trams look as good as the Nigerian aircraft. Would I have been able to explain that "our people" from the east would have stolen the trackers on the trams and used them in their shops or that the guys who frequently checked if passengers had paid with their chip card would have been beaten more than once if they had tried it in naija.

How would I have explained that almost no social system works in Nigeria. Eventually I lied...through my teeth.

"Nigeria is so much fun! We are warm and very nice people. Nice weather, beautiful diverse cultural heritage"

Hopefully, he understands that by nice people I mean that he would be treated better than the average Nigerian will treat his neighbor, and that Mallams will exchange euros at a higher rate.

I taught him "pikin". I showed him where I was born on Google maps. 

"I'd come to Nigeria," he said. "Hope it won't be too much trouble"

"Ermm, I don't think so," I said.

Was he kidding? I wanted to jump and dance shoki! 

I hope he comes soon enough.

In case you see me on the road when I'm with him and ask "Babe, how far na? How market?"

Just know I would deny you with an accent that would make your head spin.

*sips Lipton*